Why was the little kid sad at a funeral. He was actually happy and he was at six flags

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knock knock Dave's not here.

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Why did little Jimmy fall off his bike? Because I threw a fridge at him.

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Why was the girl crying? She had just been severely raped.

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c======3

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roses are red, violets are blue, ive no money for presents, happy christmas everybody

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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Who is worse then Charlie Sheen? Hitler.

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What did the man with no arms say to the jewish man? I have no arms.

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A man invites his Irish friend to his house. "Would you like something to drink?" the man asks. "Just kidding, we don't have any drinks." Later, they die of dehydration.

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there once was a man from Nantucket. He was a fisherman.

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What was funny about the Halocast? Nothing, thousands of innocent people died

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Why cant jonny walk? He has no legs.

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How do you kill a hobo? Throw a penny off a clif.. How do you kill another hobo? Tell him the penny's still down there

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You have now entered Automatic Breathing Mode

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Q: What did the kid with no arms and legs get for christmas? A: Cancer

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why did John get hard? He froze to death

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"Knock Knock" "You know the doorbell is working?" "Oh, well, you know I'm here now. May I come in?" "Yes, have a cup of tea"

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm gonna f*ck you with a rake.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken is subject to speculation.

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Why do so many black people like watermelon? The same reason so many white people, do. Have you had that stuff, it's really good!

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Q:What's black and white and red all over? A: An interracial couple in a car crash.

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Q. What's better then a baby in a microwave? A. What the hell is wrong with you? Did your parents not love you enough when you were born? Everything is worse then a baby in a microwave! Besides the felony charges it is extremely wrong! Your going to hell.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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