What do you call a black man with no legs? A fine example of the consequences of drink driving. Make sure you are physically stable or not under the effects of depressants, drugs or any form of alcohol before deciding to use a motor vehicle.

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Q: How do you turn a purple panda into a red panda A: Feed it grey poop and because it tasted so bad it got so mad it turned red.

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The man was allergic to water. He unfortunately died because water is needed to sustain health as a human.

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A boy goes into a Bakery and asks for a loaf of bread, the baker asks him if he wants a white loaf or a Wholemeal loaf, the boy replies, "it doesn't matter i have my bike outside"

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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked

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What's the best time to go to the dentist? Whenever your appointment is scheduled.

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EVERYONE TEXT 513-646-2835 AND ASK HIM WHY HE HAS GOOP IN HIS PANTS. his names travis

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Q-What do you call a dog with no legs? A-Nothing because he cant come over to you anyway..

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1 111111 1 1 11111111111 1 1 111111 1

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While running away a burgular cut his hand on a piece of glass. He fell to the ground bleeding like crazy. What did the police say when he saw the burgular? You've been caught red handed.

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It sucks if you have amnesia. It sucks if you have amnesia.

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Whats the difference between a boy scout and a jew? A boy scout gets to come home after camp.

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Yo Dawg, I heard You Like Kittens and Volcanoes... So, I threw Your Kitten In A Volcano.

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-Will you follow the live coverage of 86th Acacemy Awards? -No. -Are you anti-semitic?

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Michael Jackson walks into a bar No he doesn't. He's dead.

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What happens when Chuck Norris jumps in the air? He lands.

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Q: How can you tell when your selling a Blondel a microwave A: she will keep asking how many chandler the Tv gets

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OR SOMETHING! VOLUME ONE SPECIAL ALPHA MAN EDITION: What do you do if you are in the jungle, and surrounded by a tiger, and a jaguar and have only one bullet left in the rifle? You shoot the damn jaguar in its tire, and RIDE THE GODDAMN TIGER BACK HOME! MORAL MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN! THE FRIENDLY NEIGHBORHOOD R*PIST!(Yes I also wrote the original kay?)

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What's black and hangs from my tree? A black man. I am a racist.

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Why did the ship get lost at sea? The captain was a piece of bread.

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Knock Knock? Why did you just say knock knock just ring the doorbell

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Q: What has 2 eyes and 2 halves of pigs' snout? A: Two pigs peeking around a corner.

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What's the best way to suprise your friend? Shove a banana up his ass.

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what happened to the man that got shot.... He died.. 3 secs after

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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