Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earrings? A: Those that wear them think that said earrings positively accentuate their physical appearance.

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There are two men on a dock. The first man says, "What's your name?" The second man says, "GET OFF!" because he has turrets.

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baby on board sign?? target aquired.............

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What's green and has wheels? A refrigerator, I lied about the green and the wheels.

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Quinn Grifith Randel lives in Roswell, GA

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A man reaches to grab a womans chest and then realizing hes gay, backs off and everyone goes home happy

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Weed.

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What's the dumbest animal in the rainforest? A polar bear.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

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A horse walks into a bar. It trips over a barstool, breaks it's leg, and is butchered and turned into canned dog food.

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Guy 1: What the shit is that car? Guy 2: Its not a car. It's an alfa romeo

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What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

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Kys

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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Q: What do you call a Chelsea fan on the moon? A: A Problem. Q: What do you call 100 Chelsea fans on the moon? A: An even bigger problem. Q: What do you call all the Chelsea fans on the moon? A: Problem solved hahaha Q: What would you get if Newcastle were relegated? A: 45,000 more Chelsea fans

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EVOLUTION OF MODERN SAYINGS 1 The Samurai: If at first you don't succeed, kill yourself. The British: If at first you don't succeed, give up The Americans: If at first you don't succeed, sue someone, then try again in hopes of a larger payout next time

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A dog walks into a bar. the owner of the bar didn't allow animal in his bar and he helped the dog outside again

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Today i saw 2 midgets walking.........now there hanging together.....in a tree.....by there necks,,,,...............I f***n hate midgets

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Q: where was Johnny during the bombing? A: everywhere

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What is the difference between a snail and whale? A loaf of bread

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Why did the old man miss the Alzheimer's Day walk? Because he died in his sleep.

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Roses are blue Violets are red Sugar are you And so is sweet

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he thought he saw a dangerous predator in the area and crossed the road in an attempt to flee the dangerous situation.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes now you do too.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops