Two tomatoes were crossing a road when one of them got hit by a truck. The other said, Carrot.

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Justin Bieber's voice sounds like Michael J. Fox playing a theramin.

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q. a whale walks into a bar. The bartender asks"why are you wailling?" A. I my 3 year-old son died.

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why are the Harold and Kumar movies really funny? the man who wrote obvieusly has a good sense of humor.

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what did the dog say to the mailman? woof.

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Why are lawers are so scared of Jerry bryant? Because he bites

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A grasshopper walks into a bar and the bartender says "Hey! We have a drink named after you!" The grasshopper doesn't respond because he is a grasshopper and therefore can't talk.

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Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

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Wanna hear a joke? Me to.

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I used to be an Adventurer like you, but then i took and arrow to the Elbow.

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A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

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During english, we started talking about Attention Deficit Disorder when... OOOOOOOOOHHHHHH SHINY... wait what were we talking about

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How can you tell the difference between Brooke Colbert or any other girl Jesse has been with? It's easy, Brooke the only one Jesses ever been with. They even share the same bra size.

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Why did little Susie fall off the swing? Because she fell out the window and landed in soot.

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Q:Why did the boy have no friends A: because Ants are not considered friends

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his village has been ravaged by small pox.

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A man gets three wishes from a talking banana. His first wish is for a gay lover, his second wish is to have a naked grizzly bear, and his third is to become a professional tennis player. Soon after he got Aids from the Grizzly bear.

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why wouldn't the man's car work? because it was broken.

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what happened to Timmy when he fell off his bike? CANCER.

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whats the difference between me and callum ? one soul.

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How do you wake up lady GaGa? You po po po poker face!

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A black duck walks into a bar. Duck: "I'll have a beer." Bartender: " How you paying for that?" Duck: "Put it on the tax payers."

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Why did Sally fall of the swing? She had Down-Syndrome.

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Saggy Nipples By chan chan

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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