A guy walks into a bra. The woman screams and calls 991.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The barman says "What is this? A joke?" They then proceed to rape the barman.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

I hate it when people talk about concentration camps... my grandad died in one He fell off the guard tower

thumb_up thumb_down +14

So, I was walking down the street. As i walked past a oak door an entrance to a mental institution, I heard a bored voice going, "eleven, eleven, eleven". My curiosity, like a cat, got better of me and I decided to take a peek through the key hole and see the eleven things being counted. As soon as I had my eye on the key hole, I was poked in the eye by a metal rod. Startled, I feel back to the street. And, sure enough, heard the same bored voice, going, "twelve, twelve, twelve".

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A black man is like a sledge hammer; if you compare him to a sledge hammer, he will hit you with a sledge hammer.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Do you want to hear a shit joke? Stuart.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the man get ran over by th STREET? Because he crossed the TURTLE!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Lol XD,now that is bad ass of you to say that, what about her, does she get to go around too?

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the man say when he saw a tornado coming his way? "Oh my god, that's a tornado. I better get out of its way so I don't get injured.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Roses are red violets are blue this poem makes no sense refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what do you call mexicans in a circle around a house? a spicket fence

thumb_up thumb_down +14

scenario: retarded monkey upside down in a mirror question: why is jims dad fat answer: the mexican chicken is an aperadus

thumb_up thumb_down +14

roses are red violets are blue some poems make sense banana monkey glue

thumb_up thumb_down +14

"If life was fair, I would have a girlfriend" - William Deane

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Santa stops after 3 hos

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A blonde walked into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Knock knock Knock knock Knock knock I have outsimers Wait why am i here?

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Person 1: Why do Jews have big noses? Person 2: Why? Person 1: No, I was asking you that question. Person 2: ??!!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A spanish comedian walked into a bar. He was on time for his act.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How can you tell when a African man is lying? Like any other person you would use a lie detector.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A man dreamt that he was eating a marshmallow. He ate his dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see monkey do. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the second monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

James' father died from being overweight. The next day in the mail, James received a coupon for Skinny's garcinia cambogia pills to help him lost weight. Simply put, it was not a good day for James.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Yo momma so fat she should be concerned of contracting Coronary Heart Disease, high blood pressure, type 2 diabetes, abnormal blood fats, metabolic syndrome, cancer, osteoarthritis, sleep apnea, or even obesity hypoventilation syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops