Why were the babies used for target practice? Hitler demanded the Nazis to do so.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

STOP LOOKING AT MY JOKE

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What did the Dyslexic man write on his Christmas card? Merry Christmas

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they're already smart enough to achieve interplanetary space travel.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Knock Knock. "Who's there?" The cops.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I told a woman to make me at turkey sandwich. Of course she complied seeing as I was at Subway.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Arron Glass

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How long does it take a black woman to take a shit? Why in the world would you want to know something like that? But anyway, the answer is somewhere, on average, between 10 seconds and 15 minutes. It really varies and conditions like irritable bowel syndrome and constipation affect this range. Actually it takes about 9 months.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what did the 35 year old man say when he walked in his home last night? Nothing, he started crying because he saw that someone had viciously killed his guinea pig.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A guy walks into a bar. Ouch

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A duck, a mailman, and a poet were contemplating suicide, then they changed their minds.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did the bear stick his head in the honey comb? He wanted honey.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

hi hi strager danger

thumb_up thumb_down -79

What did the prisoner receive on his 44th birthday? Well obviously all mail in prisons is checked, but nothing dangerous was found. He received a book on different types of steam engines (he is a railway fan), some chocolate (galaxy caramel, which is his favourite), a crossword challenge book (he gets bored in his cell) and the anti joke book.

thumb_up thumb_down -97

What is the most attractive part of a woman's body? The part where she doesn't have a penis. I know, I know, the no-penis thing looks weird and strange, but hear me out. I think it's kind of cute and quirky. Like, oops, there's something that's supposed to be there, but isn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +112

What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

thumb_up thumb_down +62

hi, im sober.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Why did the Calculus teacher give an Asian student an F on a test? Because he got less than 60% of the answers correct.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why wouldn't the girl clean her room? She was paralyzed.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What did zero say to ten? I see you found someone

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Q: A black man is walking down the street with a television, where did he just come from? A: Best Buy, he just got a bonus, and wanted to reward himself.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Robin, get in the Batmobile.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops