how are a plum and a rabbit the same? they are both purple except the rabbit

Why mommy upset cause wet and sticky make mommy upset

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish.

What do you call something you should prepare yourself for when having sex with a prostitute? A.I.D.S

how do you put a giraffe in a fridge? open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door. how do you put an elephant in a fridge? open the door, take out the giraffe, put the elephant in and close the door. the lion king is holding a conference in the jungle and all the animals turn up except for one, which animal is missing? the elephant, it's in the fridge. you come across a river you need to cross, but it is infested with man-eating crocodiles, how to you cross the river without dying? just swim across, all the crocodiles are at the conference.

Why did Cody sit in the corner? Because his daddy didn't love him. #DaddyDoesn'tLoveYouAnymoreChair

Isn't it funny that we think it's totally normal for females to not have penises but for literally EVERY OTHER group of people, it's weird and not ok double standard?

What's black, and hangs from trees in my backyard? Blackberries

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I was dropped on my head as a baby, kjhgfiehcgbfbjebfiuheggfcug

How the hell did Susie get on the swing anyway I don't know you tell me?

A black walks into a bar Because it is still around the time of segregation, they don't serve colored people

Roses are red Violets are blue I regurgitate doorknobs

Guy 1: So who did you have sex with? Guy 2: I was Fucking Austria. Guy 1: What do you mean? Guy 2: Look it up.

what does the pope have against homosexuals a whip

Invisible Television.

Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it's a chicken and it doesn't know any better. It probably doesn't know where it is much less where it's going.

Wanna here a joke? Womens rights

What is matt dalys favorite thing in the world? penis

Q: What did the diddler say to the little boy? A: Can i touch you inappropriately?

wanna hear a joke? katie chandler

Sarah Palin walks into a bar and the bartender tells her to get the f*&k out.

How do you kill a blonde? A gun, knife, there are a number of ways really...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...