What's brown and adhesive? A stick

What do people call the completely paralyzed man with no eyes? David, his name.

Like to tell patrick porcupine to stop gaming

Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the salamander, macaroni and cheese.

What was the blind man doing on the bridge? Getting struck by lightning.

Q: What's worse than 6 dead babies in a trash can? A: One dead baby in 6 trash cans.

a blind man drinking from a dog, thinking it was a fountain

What do you get when you put your dick in a potato? A guy who is into creepy sex

What did the boy say when he got hit by a car? Nothing, he punctured his lungs.

A girl cries as she drops a box of uncooked spaghetti noodles, spilling and breaking them onto the floor. She has brittle bone disease.

What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a ferrari? You can't find a ferrari in my garage.

Yock

I wife my butt after I poop. I poop out of my penis.

I did not thumb this up myself!... *click* Whoops! At least I am not that douche Moral Man eh? Moral: Whoops! Now if I just don't accidentally type in the answer and...

Why are female badgers more attracted to the smell of cheese than male badgers? I don't know. Ask Bill Snodgrass

How many cops does it take to change a lightb- [Beaten to death by cops]

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? George Bush

Why was Jimmy upset? Someone kept pouring liquid nitrogen on him.

On Tuesday mornings at 7:32 a.m., what is the square root of 31? I don't know, because it would be an irrational number of which is not possible to calculate without the aid of a calculator. However, the date and time would not affect the answer.

Knock knock, Whos there? Your adopted.

Q: Why do black people buy so many pairs of shoes? A: Because when they outgrow there old pair they need new shoes.

there was a guy who wanted to be bad and have bitches but he died from all the smoking and drinking and went to hell for eternal damnation

there once was a man from Nantucket. I want to ride in a helicopter.

The foreskin of a baby gorilla

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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