How many dead babies will fit in a bathtub? Seventeen

What do you call a kid without any friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

Why was the little kid bullied? Because kids are goats.

Why does life suck? Because it does

Wiggle wiggle wiggle yeah

Thanks I guess, I do look a lot like that anime, except my eyes are not giant and I got lips and you know about everything else is different, besides I wear blue or brown contact lenses Ohh, and in case you had not already noticed, I dye my hair brown, believe me, there is enough red in me to go around already... Nero huh? Angelo Nero? So what kind of sick parents did you really have, or do you have? This is weird, you suddenly got even more interesting Nero.

Why didn't the hispanic muslim woman vote for Donald Trump in the 2016 primaries? Because she lives in Connecticut where the primaries have not yet taken place.

hey did you hear about Osama bin laden? He was found by the CIA and killed on account of his atrocious actions.

Does that doctor take insurance? No, the receptionist takes the insurance, the doctor takes your blood... Well actually, the nurse does that.

What do potatoes wear to bed? Potatoes don't sleep and don't wear clothes.

A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

What's the only thing a Black Hole can't absorb? Nothing. It absorbs everything, even light.

How do you make a black plumber cry? - kill his whole family

Why did the purse kill a circus yeast? Secks

How many ADD kids does it take to screw...

.......ah shit i forgotten the joke

What do babies suck on? juice boxes!

Pigs have the emotional capacity of a five year old think about that next time you have to dissect one in biology

Why did the plane crash. its pilot was a loaf of bread.

What happened to the baby in the microwave? I don't really remember, I was too busy jacking off.

What did one Stoner say to the other? "I'm hungry, let's order pizza."

What did Santa Claus say to the young boy on Christmas Day? Santa Claus is a myth, that was actually a pedophile.

What stops a train? A missile

If life throws you cars, you are probably on LSD.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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