How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None...they can cook in the dark.

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Roses are red my underwear is brown I just sharted my pants

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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why did the Chinese man fail the driving test because he had no previous driving experience and wasn't prepared for the test

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What do you call a man named Mark? Mark

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What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy? Nothing. He can't talk, just makes awful noises and hand gestures.

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If Chuck Norris has $5, and you have $5, Chuck Norris still has more money than you.

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How many Ethiopian's can you fit in a bathtub? As many as you want, they'd all fall down the drain. JimBoto

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Why does a man have a closet full of fruits? Because he has a mental illness and there is nothing to laugh about.

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Chuck Norris can count from 1 to 100... twice!

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Hey, guess what? What? Dammit!

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What's black and blue and hates sex? The unfortunate child in a pedophile's basement who the police have yet to find.

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Light travels faster than sound, thats why people look smart until they talk.

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If life hands you lemons you're probably a hippy because you know someone named 'life'

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Yes, I did not begin this alone, but things got complicated, you know who Alex Knight is right?

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What do you do when you see someone from the kkk? Accept what you saw and move on with your day

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Roses are black Violets are white I'm colorblind

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why did the cow eat the seahorse/ because my shift keys are broken1

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Why did the little boy stop looking for his ball? Because he found it.

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Why doesn't Santa deliver gifts anymore? Because Santa died of a heart attack.

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What did the rapper Proof say when he got in a fight? Nothing, Proof is dead.

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how many jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front and 3 in the back depending on how many people decide to go

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says: "I forgot to store nuts for winter, now i am dead."

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What's white and hides in a tree. A refrigerator.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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