What did the little girl with cancer get for Christmas? Chemotherapy.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Chuck Norris and Bane recently had a fight on a bet. The result was Bane won easily as he is the much bigger and stronger man, and Chuck Norris lacks the skills he once possessed as a younger man as he is now 72 years old.

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What's the difference between zev hatis and a dwarf Nothing. They are both midgets and are going to die by the age of 25

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Why did the black guy love his new shirt? Because it was 100% cotton

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what is the difference between a black person and a white person there skin

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Yeah, I mean to be honest with you, I get that one a lot.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a murderer.

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Whats, red, blue, green, yellow, feels like popcorn, looks like jello, tastes like hydrogen peroxide and smells like burning logs? i dont know. i was asking you

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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knock knock who's there? John Oh, come in then

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What is a holocaust survivors favorite food nothing

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What did the math teacher get after he ate and he ate? A full stomach.

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What do you get when you mate a rhino with an elephant? Nothing. This mating cannot produce offspring.

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What did Stevie Wander get for christmas? A book

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What worse than stubbing your toe? Getting raped by a panda.

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Why is an Orange, Orange??? Because its not blue!

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A black man has a woman up against a wall, and she is screaming. they are passionate lovers and he is pleasing her greatly.

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Q. how to kill the germ on a food. A. wash it with bleach.

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So I says to the guy "take the money and run." He then takes my money and walks down the street.

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fallow me on twitter #ieatveloceraptorsfordinner

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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A chicken walked into the bar...

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So three black men walk into a bank, one of them uses the ATM, they all proceed to the exit after he is done.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops