How did little Jimmy survive the 20 story fall? He couldn't he died from the last fall, aren't you paying attention?

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What did King Tut say when he got scared? How would I know? It was over a thousand years ago.

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What's worse than rape? Gang rape.

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What did the man with tourettes yell on an airplane? He yelled bomb, and was gunned down by 2 federal marshals, one of which's stray bullets happened to hit a small child with autism.

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What did the ethiopian give his wife for her birthday? HIV

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6 was afraid of 7 because 7 8 9

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Why did the Jewish girl fall off the swing? Because Amon Goeth shot her in the head from his balcony with his rifle. --Amon Goeth's friend

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name one thing that is impossible!! A sober irishman

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What word is always spelled wrongly? None of them. Every word has been spelled right at some point.

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Have you accepted Jesus Christ as your lord and savior?

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What is full of water and drowning people A pool

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How do you fit 10 dead babies in a bowl? A blender How do you get them out? Chips

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In Soviet Russia, life was very hard due to the failing economy and oppressive government.

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What do you call a blonde with a Doctorate in Physics? Doctor (Dr).

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Did you hear that Jerry Sandusky won the swimming race? He's in very good shape for a man his age.

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Susie had no arms and no legs.. what did she get for Christmas? Cancer. Amy was riding on a swing.. who was pushing her? Not Susie.

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What happened to the soldier who go shot while fighting terrorists in the middle east? He died and had a proper funeral back in the town/city that he was born in.

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What do you call a boy with no arm and no legs in a fire? Screwed.

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A car walked into a bar... wait no it didn't it has wheels.

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Whats worst than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

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Jerry.

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What did the man say when he was having sex with his wife? That feels quite good.

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How did the chicken cross the road? Suicide. There was a graveyard across the street. RIP Mr. Chicken.

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It was okay, then Alice my friend and a nurse insisted (she can be a total bitch) I take a painkiller, of course that messed up my focus completely and threw off my hypnotic suggestion which I use to shut down the pain receptors. Ironically I cannot seem to shut off my allergy to dust. Oh, yeah it was the standard bullshit Mensa test, ten patterns or something, oh and while I am terrible at trivia, I am actually much smarter than a fifth grader, I mean one kid told me he was smarter because he could do math better than me and he could, so I choked the little bitch to death, who is the smartest one now?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops