BF:Roses r red Violets r blue a face like ur's shuld b i n the zoo but dont worry i'll be there but not in the cage but laughing at u. GF:Wanna c a magic trick? POOF ur single

what did one soldier say to the other... dude take your finger out my a** it has been that long

Nah

How do you kill a blue elephant? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a white elephant? No there is no such thing as a white elephant gun. You take it's trunk, then strangle it until it turns blue. Then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

Why did the guy eat his mom? people get hungry in this world

A man didn't feel well so he went to the toilet. He had explosive diahrria, then felt better.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A man with no arms and no legs

women's rights

I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11

Why did a black kid kill his teacher? No reason. That what they do

Friends are a lot like trees... ...they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some Chap-stick, and put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because, as all people know, Ducks cannot speak. However, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting a prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need Chap-stick anyway, since he has no lips.

Why was the African american pulled over in New Jersey? He was 17 and didn't have his red stickers.

What's worse than accidentally flooding your bathroom? A Tsunami

A blind man walked into a bar and got a beer and got drunk and went on a rampage and killed YOUR MOM

What's the difference between a baby and a textbook? You throw a textbook at the wall with TWO hands.

Why did the black student fail his math test? Because he was severely traumatized by the school shooting that had occurred during the test. He was later relieved to hear that the teacher did not count the test, because the legal paperwork surrounding the death of 12 students was somewhat overwhelming.

Its Erron, listen, we got to talk, I do not mind your pictures, but I am not going to call you because of that weird spot on your face, its just 101 basics here, I suggest you shut down the access to this site to the rest of your employees, this might get very personal.

why do my feet smell so bad? because i havent washed them for 5 days

Remember when the new jokes on this sight actually used to be funny?

a man walks into a bar. He left after he drank two beers. Someone pulled his pants down and he didnt notice. when he got home he realized his pants were gone. He returned to the bar to search, but it was a metal bar, and he was fairly stupid. please dont laugh

Why is ms Wolfe mean? Because she is a poop face

How many Haitians does it take to change a lightbulb? Typically one, unless the light bulb referenced is in an inconvenient location or is over-sized / industrial grade.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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