why did the monkey buy a shoe? to put em on!!!!

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There is a dead guy on the road lying in a puddle of blood with a gunshot wound on his head. What happened? He died

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Steve buys 60 watermelons.. What does he have? A lot of watermelons.

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A man walks into a bar, sits down and the bartender comes over and asks him what he wants to drink. The man replies, "Carrot Juice."

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Yo mama is so fat that her belly button reaches the door 15 minutes before she does- by Adam Chebali

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A man walks into a bar. The second man sees the first man's mistake and ducks. The third man needs to take no precautions as he is a midget and can simply walk under the bar.

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Whats worse than being raped? Being raped twice.

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Why's the sun red? It's not it's orange.........retard

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Thank you so much Nero, I have read it and I am crying because I am happy, at first I was worried because I have never cried out of happiness before. But its over. Nero, you underestimate yourself a lot, promise me we will work with that together, sometimes you almost convince me you are as inferior as you say, but then you get out of your shell of doubt your past has caused in you (its not you when you doubt yourself its what they put in you), you are always there when people need you, teach me hypnosis someday and let me remove that part of you which does not allow you to believe in yourself. Dont reply Nero, calm down and sleep, I feel you are allright, I just know.

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How do you milk a cow? Pull on its' utters.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Btw I have aids And now you too

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What's the difference between celery and a truck?

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On the dora show when they asked where the Monster was why did the arrow point left instead of right?? Because it was scared

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Sally has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because seven "eight" nine. Yeah, I went there.

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Why did the chicken cross the road It didint make it across

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What's red and funny? The holocaust

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Why was the white man chosen for the job over the black guy? He had more work experience and was clearly the better suited applicant.

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What's the difference between Jordan and Time? Time passes!!

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Why did then plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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what did the dead man say to the other dead man ...nothing he's dead.

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what did the man say when he walked into the bar? ouch!

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Q: what's the difference between a young, geeky kid living in Wisconsin's basketball and Yao Ming's basketball? A: young, geeky kids cannot live in Wisconsin's basketball. Wisconsin is a state, and states cannot own objects because they aren't sentient beings. And Yao Ming's basketball... is just a regular basketball that happens to be owned by Yao Ming.

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what does a baby with no lims get for christmas...cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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