What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Accept for cancer.

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Girl: How do I know if I'm Jewish? Guy: Are you Jewish? Girl: No. Guy: There ya go.

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Im going to the patriots jets game this year..... When the kick a feild goal and you see two kids wearing lime green holding up a poster that says BRADY LIKES SAGGY BALLS that will be me and my friend -RT

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

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Two men walk into a bar. They get drunk and leave. 2 hours later there's a newscast about two drunken men who died in a car accident. It wasn't them, the newscast about them came shortly after

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Feeling that your friends do not listen to your insightful conversations? BUY A PARROT! Teach it to say "Uhuh", and "Ahah", and "Dats coo!" NOW YOU CAN BE COMPLETELY APRECIATED BY A FUCKING BIRD THAT DOES NOT KNOW WHAT YOU ARE SAYING... ...BUT IS IT... APPRECIATING IT? DUUUUUUUN DUUUUUUUUN DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN! MYSTERY!

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Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A Mexican is a Mexican and a bench is a bench.

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What did the little girl with cancer get for Christmas? Chemotherapy.

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boobs!

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what did the special ed kid get on his iq test? drool

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What did the horse say to the man? The man woke up from his dream so he didn't know either

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why did the chicken cross the road it didnt

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Ask me if im a tree? No

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"It's A Bird!!!" "It's A Plane!!!" "No, It's not either of those things."

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what has two legs and is red all over? half a cat

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I have three heads and nine eyes, what am I? I'm a liar.

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How do you confuse a blonde? put her in a circular room and tell her to stand in the corner

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What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

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Your moms so fat she struggles to to everyday tasks

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Some black guy grabs a white guys wallet. the black guy says " hey I think you dropped this"

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I am paralyzed from the neck down.

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What happens when someone with ADD tells a joke? I forgot.

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What did the little girl who's parents died in a car accident get you her birthday? Foster Parents

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Why are there no swimming pools in Mexico? The average yearly income is $3,523, and pool chemicals are very expensive.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops