What was the pirate movie rated? Pg-13

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A scotsmen, an Irishman and an Englishman all walk into a bar. The publican had accidentally left the door unlocked and the bar was in fact closed. So they left.

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Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first polar bear says, "Pass the soap." The second polar bear replies, "No soap, radio." OMG YOU DON'T GET IT?!?!?!?! NOOB

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The guy above me has a very nice joke

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I'm a poet and I didn't even realize I was one

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yo mamma so fat she got pied to be the Olympic swimming pool

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What do you call the fear of anteaters? Stupid.

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Who wants pizza crusts?

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Roses are red Violets are blue I need to go to the bathroom.

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police are looking for max 'cheesehead' harrison

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Why wasn't 7 afraid of 6? Numbers are numbers and therefore incapable of feeling any emotion.

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A dyslexic paraplegic walks into a bra

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What colour is chocolate? Brown.

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What did the blind kid that couldn't talk get for Christmas Cancer

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knock knock , who there ray, ray who , ray winstone , I am your daddy you'll get your perks.

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How many gays does it take to change a light bulb? 1, even if hes not happy im sure he would still be able to change it.

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Why did the man steal the little girl? He didn't. She was his daughter and they were driving home after picking up the groceries.

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5

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A man went to the doctor with a strange complaint. "Well it's like this Doc, when I drive to work in the morning through the country lanes I start to sing 'The green green grass of home'. If I see a cat then it's 'What's new, pussy cat?'. It's so embarrassing, even when I'm asleep and dreaming, I still keep singing. Last night, it was 'Delilah', and my wife was not amused!" "Yes, it would apear that you have the early symptoms of Tom Jones syndrome." "Well I've never heard of that, is it common?" asked the man. "Yes," replied the doctor, "It is very uncommon."

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a man walks into a bar the bar tender says why the long face? i just walked into a bar

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Why was Sally lying on the ground? Cause she was dead

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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