Q: Ask me how far have you gone with a girl? A: Mexico

thumb_up thumb_down +6

When life gives you lemons you have lemons.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: Where was Moses when the lights went out. A: In the dark.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did Osama bin Laden cross the road? To get shot in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

~Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? ~ ~He was dead. ~ ~Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? ~ ~He was stapled to the monkey!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q. Whats Brow and rhymes with Snoop? A Dr. Dre

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock Knock Who's there? Banana Bananas can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

where did susan go durring the explotion? every where...

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff. What's not pink and fluffy? Rape.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what's worse than getting raped the guy who raped you has aids

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q.whats long, black and hard to cut through? A.a line at kfc!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What is funny and has three legs? Not the Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you get when you see a black man writing? A man devoted to getting a education.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house... knock knock who's there the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Person 1: Ask me if I'm a truck? Person 2: Are you a truck? Person 1: No.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Andy Carrol

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the man sit down? Because he was tired of standing up.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

So a man walks into a bar, asks for a beer, then drinks it. He then goes home expecting to have dinner with his wife and 2 kids. His wife smells his breath before that and asks him what happens. The men opens to his true and only love and tells her he's having a bad time at work. So they share a hug and talk about it. The man is then renewed, starts pulling up at his job and gets a promotion to general supervisor. He lives happily and watches his kids grow and become professionals. He then dies of a heart attack at the advanced age of 89 while he was watching his favorite TV show.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

When someone throws a rock at you What do you say? A:Oww

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Big feet on a man means he has, Nothing, a man's foot size has no relation to the size of his penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

how do you wake up lady gaga? you set her alarm for the intended time

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the man's ex-wife told him after their divorce? "Build a bridge and get over did" And so he did because hes a contractor that specialized in structures spanning and providing passage over a gap or barrier, such as a river or roadway

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops