Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at his genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water, Jack fell down and broke his crown and Jill came tumbling after. They both died of blood loss.

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Twilight is so bad, I read it and personally didn't like it as a book.

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I'm Ryan Dunn, and this is a 120 mph car crash

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An Irishman walks out of a bar.

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What's the hardest thing to do while masturbating? Having sex.

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whats the difference between a fat person and a skinny person ? there weight.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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A man was feeling sick and decided to go and see a doctor. He saw the doctor and then went home. He wasn't feeling any better so he decided to get checked-out by the doctor.

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1 out of every 3 relationships someone is cheating, I wonder if it was my wife or my girlfriend

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What is "race car" spelled backwards? rac ecar.

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Q: What did the duck say to the other duck? A: Quack

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it wanted to get to the other side! why did the chipmunk cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken

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Q: What do you call a girl who wears a tuxedo to prom? A: Comfortable with the way she looks.

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Q: What did the black man, the white man, the hispanic man, and the english man have in common? A: They all enjoyed broccoli.

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kcid gib a evah uoy neht sdrawkcab siht daer nac uoy fi

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What is the difference between a Mexican and a bench? One is a person and one is an inanimate object

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Why did the black guy cross the road? He didn't because he forgot to precede crossing the busy street with caution; therefore he was critically injured and then placed in a hospital.

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— Knock knock. — Who's there? — Funny. — Funny who? — A funny joke.

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Knock Knock I have a door bell It's broken Oh

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Man: Why do you wear your wedding ring on the wrong finger? Woman: Oh, wow, thanks for pointing that out. Silly me.

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Why didn't Jesus like Pizza? Because Pizza doesn't exist.

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How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

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I woke up in bed with someone this morning. I forget why this is a joke, but your mother is a whore.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops