what happened when a duck flew over the hunter during duck hunting season? the hunter shot at the bird, but fortunately, the hunter was nit very good so the duck flew back to his wife and children by the pond.

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis

What do you get six year old Hitler for his birthday? An Easy Bake Oven

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why are you worrying about the chicken? You just got shot.

A giraffe walks into a bar.... just kidding, a giraffe wouldnt fit in a bar.

Imagine a scenario Add a Rhubarb Crumble into your scenario Add your mother and father sitting together watching the news in your scenario. Your scenario should take place in an old people's home Add an Olympic athlete doing the splits into your scenario If there were any crane-flies in your scenario, be sure to subtract them at once. Divide your scenario by two. Your scenario should now be a mental image of flying horses and a hippopotamus eating a large salmon mousse. There will be a pig tied to a pair of sunglasses.

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

What is worse than the Holocaust? Women's sports

what do you call white people running down a mountain? Avalanche What do you call black people running down a mountain? Jailbreak

Why did the poorly educated man get fired from the M&M factory? He changed the M's to W's!

How many Jews do you have to kill in order to make a museum? 6 Million.

How do you kill a retard? you shoot him in the head

How do you save Africa. Put a rash of bacon in and envelope.

Arrow in the Knee!

A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

A White guy, Asian guy, and Black guy walk into a bar, and the Black guy wins the joke, as to not be racist.

Why did the person have a scrape on their elbow? Because they fell down.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died.

Statues: Show what great people look like, if birds shit all over them.

Hey connor and brett its ben, you are both at my house

Why did the other Albino cross the road? He was running away from a witch doctor who was going to brutally murder him and steal his body parts.

A man wanted to kill himself.. He did.

Whats better than 1 person in your oven? 9 people in your oven.

When life gives you ponies... get a new life!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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