Yo mommas so fat they had to change 'one size fits all' to 'one size fits most'

Why did he buy ANTIJOKE THE BOOK! - ? Because he wanted to read it.

I enjoy the fact that the jokes I post that do not make me laugh, are the ones that get zero thumbs, while those that at least make me smile, get at least a couple, I admit thought that its hard to keep track with me, I type jokes so fast that they disappear in the back before people can thumb them... Have you heard... Of the dog that was barking up the wrong three? The three said: Damn dog! I am not a tree! The dog kept barking, as dogs do not speak. Moral: Numbers speak fluently in most languages though...

Why do I staple a mans mouth to his penis. Because I wanted to

ALL OF YOU NO MORE CURSING EVEN THOUGH ITS NOT POSSABLE SO DON'T LISTEN

What happened when the chicken crossed the road? He was hit by a bus!

What did 6 say to 7? Nothing, numbers are abstract concepts thought up by humans and therefore, they cannot speak or converse in any sort of language.

You should periodically review the most up-to-date version of the Terms of Service. Oh you.

Ask me if I'm a flower. Are you a flower? No.

How do you know that god was a male? You don't, that's why it's called faith.

Justin Bieber walks into a Gay-Bar. He is then kindly escorted out because he is underage. Also, because the patrons gave him certain looks that brought concern to the heterosexual bartender.

A man walks into a bar. He leaves when he realizes he is supposed to be at a business meeting

What is green and invisible? This cabbage.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being shot repeatedly in the chest.

Like CHUCK NORRIS, CHUCK NORRIS like You !

Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

Wanna hear a joke? Womens' rights

Whats worse than the holucaust.......... Nothing

What can be worst than letting someone you dont know run a chainsaw? Letting Smokey Dokey run a chainsaw!

Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. Everyone is amazed because he can now walk.

2 men walk into a bar. The first man proceeds to fall on the ground and let out a string of obscenities, obviously in excruciating pain. The second man, fearing that he may have suffered some sort of concussion, immediately goes to his doctor and gets checked out. He is still awaiting results.

Why didn't Joe have any friends? Because according to Thomas Hobbes man is anti-social by nature and therefore the only friends that he has are purely to reach his own ends and thus Joe cannot truly have friends in the sense that many use the word.

What do you call a fly without wings? A fly without wings.

What do old people really like? Anal sex.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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