Two men and a woman walk into a bar. They are all viciously murdered by a serial killer, who as he walks out, runs into a pole and suffers from a concussion, which he later dies from.

It’s dead.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. This next line doesn't rhyme. Nor does this one. This isn't a very good poem.

If a man without hands is called a handicap, what do you call a man without legs? A handicap.

What do you get when you cross some eggs and some toast? Breakfast.

Q: Why did the little girl upset? A: Because she was part of the human centipede

What did the poor sickly orphan get for Christmas? Nothing.

a black man and a squirrel get hit on two different roads what's the difference? well for starters theyre two different species. a squirrel is much smaller than a human and has his own mark on society. the man will be missed dearly by his family and if the impact with the car wasnt bad, he may have a chance to make it out alive at the hospital. the squirrel however is not so lucky. it will be left to die on the street or would have died on impact already with sadly no squirrel hospital to tend to it.

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Wherever you left it

A man walks into a 1980's style restaurant he takes a seat and orders his meal.

What does 1+1 equal? 2

What's gold and looks like a brick? A gold brick. What's gold and looks like a nugget? A gold nugget. Whats gold and like a car? Gold. I lied about the car.

What did the gay logger do to the tree with a hole in it? Cut it down.

What did the widow get for mothers day A miscarriage

Q: What does 'A' stand for? A: Effort

ive got a joke for you Nicki minajs ase

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks, why the long face? The man replies "i have a huge malignant tumor in my chin"

Knock knock Who's There? (It was a ding dong ditch. Or a knock knock ditch. What ever.)

What did the two fire men say to each other whilst a house was burning? Well be better put that fire.

Why do I staple a mans mouth to his penis. Because I wanted to

What's faster than a black guy with your TV? Probably someone who doesn't have to carry such a heavy object.

Knock-Knock who's there? Artichoke Artichoke who? Your friend Artie choked on a ham sandwich, and I'm sorry to inform you that he didn't survive.

Justin Bieber walks into a Gay-Bar. He is then kindly escorted out because he is underage. Also, because the patrons gave him certain looks that brought concern to the heterosexual bartender.

How many lemons does it take to fix a lightbulb Lemons can't fix lightbulbs as the don't have a mind,heart or any limbs.Think about that crap.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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