9/11

A black man, a Jew and a Hispanic man walk into a bar and the bartender says "Hello. What could I get for you?" The black man had a Manhattan. The Hispanic man had a Bloody Mary. The Jew merely had water, as his religion forbids alcohol. The trio enjoy their drinks and then exit the establishment.

why did the man die? because he died.

What's worse than getting kicked by a horse? Drowning.

What's the difference between Justin Beeber and a Basett hound? I don't know.

What do you call a chicken with it's head chopped off. A decapitated chicken.

Have you ever seen that clown at walmart that hides from gay people?

Why did the the man not take acting? He wasn't good at it.

Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

Knock Knock Whos there? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour who? Wait aren't you the one who's supposed to supposed tell the punchline? Oh Yeah

Why was the black man afraid of the chainsaw? Because its a potentially dangerous weapon

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What's worse than listening to Justin Beiber? Getting hit by a train.

Why does my ass hurt I played gmod with a blackpeople

Why did the President Truman approve the use a nuke over Hiroshima? Sending Chuck Norris was widely considered to be too cruel.

Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? No.

Why did the room packed with married people seem empty? Maybe they were all playing hide-and-seek. Or maybe the room was pitch black and they were all standing very still and quietly.

your momma is so poor she had you just for the free milk

Why did the Asian man have a small penis? Because he was flaccid.

lol

Why was the bear gay. He grew up in a disfunctional home.

agp

Wanna hear a dirty joke? If so, you're probably a pervert.

Grandma walked into the kitchen...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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