Why did the chicken cross the road? He is suicidal and should probably get help.

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Why is Joel even here? Sexperience.

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So two guys walk into a bar and the third one ducks

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Why the West African Rhino is extinct? They were never Horny

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What did the cat say to the bird? Nothing. It's a cat.

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Robert: wanna hear a joke? Robort:ok, shoot. Robert: *BANG!*

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So that its subjects will view it with admiration, as a chicken which has the daring and courage to boldly cross the road, but also with fear, for whom among them has the strength to contend with such a paragon of avian virtue? In such a manner is the princely chicken's dominion maintained.

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Q: Who followed E.T.A Hoffman? A: ASAP Rocky. (ETA and ASAP are both time-based abbreviations, ETA meaning 'estimated time of arrival' and ASAP meaning 'as soon as possible'. Thus, ASAP can form a response to a requested ETA. Additional humour comes from the dissonant occupations of the two individuals: E.T.A Hoffman being a nineteenth century gothic author, and ASAP Rocky being a modern rapper.)

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What's black and white and red all over? A Nazi banner.

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what happened when steven hawking's date stood him up? he feel down

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A brown park bench was bought. After multiple years the color had faded, and the bench was no longer the same shade of brown.

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There are two bears in a shower. One bear says "pass the soap." the other bear says "no soap. Radio."

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What do you call 4 Mexicans getting into a car late at night? 3rd Shift carpooling

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What did the pear tree say to the farmer? Go harvest that corn over yonder.

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What's your blood type? Red.

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why did the man get ran over by a turtle? he crossed the STREET

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What's black and breaks your stove when falling from a tree? Your stove

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Where does a blind person drive a car? Into a tree.

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What's the best use for a van full of candy? Donating it to an orphanage.

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Uh... What was emulating again?

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

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How can you tell if someones gay? You ask them.

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roses are grey violets are grey im color blind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops