What's black and hangs from my tree? A black man. I am a racist.

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You have 10 apples and 12 cabbages How many pizzas can you fit on the roof? Purple because aliens don't wear hats.

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Never mail in your wished to a genie, he may be dyslexic.

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how many mexicas does it take to.... on wait there done

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What's the deal with airline food? Food tastes different on an airplane. The atmosphere dries out your nose, the air pressure numbs 1/3 of your taste buds, and low humidity levels give you cotton mouth. These factors cause the food to taste worse than it normally would.

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What did the man do after his wife died? He farted.

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What has four legs one head but only one foot? A dog that was born with physical deformities.

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Obama ran for re-election in 2012. He lost because he is a horrible president. the liberal left blame his defeat on racists and propose harsh Hate-Crime punishments. America falls into disrepair.

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Why did the boy die? He got hit by the school bus.

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What did the marshmallow say to the other marshmallow? We are both bananas.

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What do you get when you cross a chicken with an alligator? Go take some acid and find out for yourself

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An Octopus walked into a bar. He then died as he had been out of his natural habitat for an exceedingly long period of time. An octopus can only survive on land for 30 minutes.

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Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Meanwhile in the basement...an elderly man, who lives a lone and whose children lead their own lives and dont have much time for him, lies on the ground unable to move after having falling down the stairs. He has been there for 2 days. He is frightened and confused, he hears someone knocking and his hopes perk up, he tries to call but due to lack of water his mouths is too dry to do so. He sobs in frustration. Knock Knock [Silence] The old man cries, aware of his fate.

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What do you call an African American woman with Tourettes? This question cannot be answered correctly. The African American woman was misdiagnosed. She is really a crack whore.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like funny jokes but I tend to ruin the punchline by just talking too much and that's probably why no one likes me and...

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Roses are red Violets are blue Actually, now that i think of it, roses come in many colors And violets are actually violet in color, thus the name

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What's black and white and red all over? A butler with a stab wound.

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Q:Whats not funny? A: Antijokes

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Why did Amy fall out of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. (Who's there?) Not Amy.

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How do you kill a blonde girl? You put a scratch and sniff sticker on the bottom of a filled pool.

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Yesterday, my friend said I should facebook him. So I slammed a book into his face.

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hey i just met you and this is crazy but so

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KNOCK KNOCK. WHO'S THERE? BOO. OH, HEY. COME IN. ....

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Three irishmen walk into a bar...every day, and then stay until it closes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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