teacher: what do you call a math book with no writing in it?! student: idk what? teacher: a notebook! student: ok... thanks

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Whats worse than getting punched in the balls? Getting punched in the balls twice.

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a man was shot.... he died

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My penis is so big that some women find it uncomfortable.

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Your mom is so stupid, she thought the square root of pie was 3.14156

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i got 5 Fingers, the middle ones for you ?

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Where's my tractor

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What hurts more than a papercut? A chainsaw between your legs.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Rhyming is hard, Zebra.

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What did the Dark Knight say to the Policeman? I'm Batman

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so... how about that airplane food

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Where did sally go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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What's white and bobs up and down in a babies crib? A pedophiles ass.

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Why was the Jamaican man smoking pot? His doctor prescribed it. The man has a serious case of glaucoma.

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:) Hey AMBY VALENT! Want to join our horsehead show below?? *Laughing track with that fat loud bitch that wont stop laughing making the actors stare at each other like douches* :/ Muuh, I dont really care im just some meh character anyway so yuh...' *Laughing track* ? ???? ORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORA! :( Hey get outta our show here you China man! *OOOH! Track plays with some fa*ott whistling* ? ???? | Baka! *leaves* *Awww track plays* *Laughing track*

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did you know why people keep saying "you know...you know..." in their conversation? well i don't know

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why did the black boy read a book. Because he had a book report due next week

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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So, a bulldozer rolls into a bar, there is no bar now.

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what do you call a redneck virgin? a seven year old that can run faster than her brothers.

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how many birds did chuck norris kill with one stone? one.

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What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education (and quite possibly from acquaintances or family members within the company that employs him, though it is often considered impolite to mention this latter fact, as it may be construed to denigrate the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study).

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A funny joke: Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. Bob has been missing since Friday.

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Q. What do you call a deceased rodent A. Deadmau5

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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