Yo mama's so fat she needed a toilet that had a bigger seat (just like me)

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A christian, a Muslim, and a Jew walked into a bar... Then the Muslim shoots the Jew and blows himself up.

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A farmer has 17 sheep standing in a field and all but 9 drop down and die. How many sheep are left? It doesn't matter. A CIA sniper guns the farmer down, along with his family and the remaining sheep. The other agents move in and remove all evidence that the government is experimenting with a new nerve agent.

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Dan was friends with Dick. Dick likes to give massages to Dan. Dan's favorite is Dickie's special mixture. He will remember Dick, his favorite personal assisatant for life. CREEPER

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A drum and a cymbal fall off a cliff...

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Nazi Nazi who? I am the mailman. I nazi your mailbox. Can I leave the letters on the front porch?

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Person 1: Knock knock. Person 2: Come in.

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Hey Jew. What? Shut up.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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I have a joke that involves a duck. Can you guess what it is? If not, then.......uh...........sorry.

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What is blue and has wheels? Grass- I lied about the colour and the wheels.

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Q: Who`s the badly treated kid at school who always faces punishment, but is inadvertently provided with recompense every single day (s)he attends class A: The poeple who fall into the category that does not encompass the people who are treated with dignity at school and never experience punishment there, but always receive some kind of reward for trying to succeed anyways.

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three men walked into a bar, two walked out... One walked into a metal pole and died

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What has four legs in the morning, three at noon, and two in the evening? A baby with leprosy.

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What should you do when your husband is staggering in the back yard Shoot him again

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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Knock knock? Whose there? Colin Come in

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I like my women like I like my coffee Without a penis

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What are 3 skills black people have that they use for basketball? Great hand eye co-ordination, communication and encouragement.

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Knock knock Who's there? *silence* WHO'S THERE? *silence* -Looks out window- Slenderman

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Knock Knock Who is there? *bang* The following story depicts the life and death of Bob:___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________then he opened the door and was shot in the face.

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Q: why does the man like men? A: because he is gay

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Maybe because it had escaped from the farm and as it doesn't have full conciousness, it couldn't distinguish between grass and the asphalt, so it happened to cross the road.

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What's worse than a murderer? Two murderers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops