Q.What do you call a black man flying a plane? A. A black pilot you racist bastard

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What did the psycho killer order for dessert? Ice Cream.

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Pigs have the emotional capacity of a five year old think about that next time you have to dissect one in biology

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Knock Knock? Who's There? Not a Jehovah's Witness, let me in!

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How do you say vampire in spanish? Vampiro.

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There are 2 women at a bus stop. One of them has a swollen belly. The pregnant woman says to the other one, "I'm expecting a baby." The other woman responds, "That's too bad. I'm expecting a bus, at least that'll help me."

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Interrupting Pessimist. Interrupting Pessi- Slavery.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I stole all your jokes, I stole this one too.

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A blind man walks into a bar. It was a book shop.

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What do you call a women with two black eyes? Someone trapped in the cycle of violence that is domestic abuse. The few friends and family members she still speaks with tell she should leave. They don't know about the last time she threatened to leave him, when he held a gun to her throat and screamed "You try an leave me I'll kill you and your precious god damn babies!" Now she suffers silently for fear of what he might do to her family, but is increasingly worried about the way her husband has begun looking at their 13 year old daughter. Every night she kneels at the foot of her bed and prays for death, over the sounds of her own sobbing and her husbands drunken rage. Also she is a slow learner.

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two men are sitting in a desk next to each other learning math when the equation 22+1 came up. the frist man says to the second, "24" and they both giggled. the second guy then slips his lips over the the first guy and whispers, "hey, i just thought of something funnier than 24" to which the first replies with a slight of laughter, "lemme hear it." so the second says with laughter "25".

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so dont touch it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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Whats 10 times worse than a war? Ten wars.

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Q. Knock knock A. Who's there Q. DEEZ A. DEEZ who A. DEEZ NUTZ HA GOT EEEEEM

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A priest was driving a motorcycle and was doing these amazing crazy stunts. It turns out they were actually filming a movie.

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What's funny and looks like a fish? A clown fish

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Why did the clown go to jail? For 23 charges of rape and murder.

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How many Jews can you fit in an ashtray? None

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Safe sex MR

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Why did the little boy cry? Because he stuck his finger into a blender

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What's hard, long and full of seamen? an erect penis.

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What does tupperware and a walrus have in common? they both like a tight seal

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There are two muffins in the oven. One says: "It's really getting hot in here!" The other one can't reply because it is already dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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