What's the difference between an elephant and I?Our mass.

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4 is half the number 8 is.

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JUSTIN BIEBER IS A FAG

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Jews...

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Shoes, socks, and mittens.

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What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

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An Irishman walked out of a bar. A Frenchman was polite. An Englishman had beautiful teeth.

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Roses are red Violets are blue My dad drinks a lot Help Me

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Why cant the white man dunk? Because he lost his legs in a horrible car accident

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How many rednecks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Three.

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What is funnier than this joke? Jokes with higher ratings.

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What do you get when you cross a turtle and a cheetah? A fictional animal.

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Penis.

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what did the dog do when he saw the flea?he ate it because he didn't know what would happen next

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Why did Uncle Monty shove his head up a horses arse? Because it gave Doris an erection. She chose to keep her male genital organs following her gender changing procedure, so that she could still father children.

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what do you do when a baby screams? shake it.

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No Mom! No! I DON'T WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU!

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What's worse than repeating holocaust jokes? Repeating the holocaust.

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So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

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Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin says "oh my god were going to die!" The other says "Holy shit a talking muffin!"

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Why am I losing my time writing this joke even knowing that I will get lots of thumbs down?

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, shes already been told twice

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Knock knock ... KNOCK KNOCK ... I guess nobody's home.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they get into the Batmobile? -Come on Robin, get into the Batmobile!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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