why do bananas wear sunscreen? becuase they peel!

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Yo mamma's so fat, she should try NutriSystem.

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A man walks into a pole.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why did the girl die? She read Twililght

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knock knock. who's there thatsron thatsron who thatsron man

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Yo mama is so stupid, she has a sub-par intelligence quota.

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Why cant the white man dunk? Because he lost his legs in a horrible car accident

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what would you do if Michael Jackson was drowning? he can't drown he's already dead

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2 men walk into a bar. The first man proceeds to fall on the ground and let out a string of obscenities, obviously in excruciating pain. The second man, fearing that he may have suffered some sort of concussion, immediately goes to his doctor and gets checked out. He is still awaiting results.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Regardless of the number of dead babies present, painting a house will require at least one living baby.

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What do you get when you cross a turtle and a cheetah? A fictional animal.

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knock knock who's there? roses are red, violets are blue, i shit in a bag and now its in flames on your porch

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I believe that as long as we do not change, as we decide to believe in ourselves and use our strength and potential, all that is left, is to see which side fate favors. Maybe we are meant to survive trough our strength and belief in ourselves and each other, or maybe we are, or will eventually end up as the last people of our kind, and fade away from life, proving that those that trust in the corrupt, where better than us. Suddenly I feel so alone.

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What do you call someone who can't move their arms or their legs A quadriplegic

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What happened when the asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

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What Happends When Sawdust Gets in your mouth You poop logs

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" then one of the costumers calls the health inspector and he shuts the place down because its not sanitary to have dirty horses in bars.

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Q: What's funny about prostitution? A: Nothing. It's a widely misunderstood profession.

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Have you heard about the new German microwave? It's a great labour-saving appliance that cooks food much more quickly than a conventional oven

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? No, he hasn't either

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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what do you call a man in a hole Fill

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69

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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