A horse walked into a bar and the bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The horse then replied, "Well my wife is dying of cancer, my mother is a drug addict, and my two kids are in the hospital for 3rd degree burns."

Why did the surfer surf in the ocean without a surfboard? Either he was mentally challenged, simply dreaming, a fish, or most likely did not have a surfboard.

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He was shot. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He was mentally disturbed. Why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure

Knock Knock! Who's there? The doorbell repair man.

Yo momma so lazy she hasn't been to work in weeks and you no longer have electricity or food.

knock knock , who there ray, ray who , ray winstone , I am your daddy you'll get your perks.

Are you Drew?

Once upon a time, a boy sat on a hedgehog. He abruptly stood up, as the spikes had caused him a certain amount of discomfort.

A priest, a rabbi and an imam walk into a bar. They proceed to have an in-depth conversation about interfaith dialogue and no one questions the imam orders of non-alcoholic beverages.

Why id the Jew keep putting his name at the end of anti jokes? He was an attention seeking big nosed virgin kunt

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She has no arms.

Where do snowmen keep their money? Snowmen don't have money

A man keeping specific track of time,eagerly waits for a punch line.

What's the best way to pick up girls? Lift with your legs, not your back.

Knock knock. who's there? Alex. GO AWAY!!!

What's the difference between a water melon and a baby? One's fun to hit with a sledge hammer, the other's just a water melon.

Why did the woman make so many sandwiches? Because she was a mother catering her child's sporting event.

every 60 seconds in africa a minute passes

What did the farmer say when he lost his truck? Wheres my truck?

Why do jews have long noses? Because they received the genetic alleles from their parents that cause the nose to grow longer.

What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot, you racist.

How do you get a Jewish man out of a pool? Ask him politely, for I'm sure he's a pleasant and reasonable fellow.

Why did the chicken cross the road? A: This is a highly unlikely circumstance due to the fact that there are no wild chickens and most chicken coops are nowhere near a road

What goes good with coca cola? Thirst

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...