How do you make a plumber sad? Steal his plums.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why was Martin Luther King Jr. Shot? Because he was black.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

PLEASE DONT READ THIS OR YOU'LL BE DIED IF YOU DON'T POST MESSAGE ON LIKE DIFFERENT VIDEO

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Matt is not funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Two cats were in a bathtub. They both, however, were uneasy the whole time, as it is common sense to know that cats do not like being in water.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A man rode into town on Friday and stayed a while and then left on Friday how did he manage this?

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did I have sex with your mom? Because she was a beautiful individual with a fine taste in the classical arts. She also offered me a ride to her place for a delicious 3 course meal. Afterwards our romance blossomed and we decided to have sexual intercourse to show our mutual appreciation for each other.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A Tatooine moisture farmer, an old man, an astromech droid, and a potocol droid walk into a cantina at Mos Eisley Space Port. The bartender says, "Hey, we don't serve their kind here! Your droids will have to wait outside." The moisture farmer then says to his droids, "Why don't you wait out by the speeder, we don't want any trouble." The protocol droid replies, "I heartily agree, sir."

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Trashcan!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why was the manspenis big Cause he was a lucky bastard

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q: What do you call a black person with one leg? A: In modern American society, it is proper etiquette to adress somebody by their first name.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How did the man with no arms or legs cross the street? He didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did carly drop her groceries Carly is a cow

thumb_up thumb_down +17

why doesnt bally lifeguard he isnt qualified

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you call an old widow with 12 cats? Forever alone.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

do want to hear a joke? Women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock knock. Whose there? Not my house so not my problem. Frankly, I don't give a shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Lady Gaga didn't have anything to wear to the playboy party.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what do you find at the top of mountains? things

thumb_up thumb_down +15

"I see," said the blind man to the deaf man.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what did the black man eat for dinner? whatever his wife makes for him to eat

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock Knock Who's there? St. Judes St.Judes who ? St.Judes Research Hospital calling. Give me money, I've got cancer kids dying

thumb_up thumb_down +15

whats da difference between a black people and grass. there both black except for the grass.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops