Q: Whats the difference between a guitar and a piece of ham? A: You can eat a piece of ham.

Why did the girl die? She read Twililght

Last Christmas I gave you my heart... but the very next day your body rejected the transplant and you died.

Like CHUCK NORRIS, CHUCK NORRIS like You !

A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Roses are red Violets are blue I like pancakes Ouch! That hurt!

What do you do when a elephant is sitting on your fence? You hit it with a fridge

Who has the biggest cock A rooster

A teenage girl walks into a bar and orders an alcoholic drink. The bartender declines the order as she is under the legal age of purchasing and consuming alcohol.

That was SOOOOO funny that I laughed!!!!!

What's the difference between a pizza and a black man A pizza can feed a family of four

Did you hear about the speed reader on top of the Twin towers? 90 stories 5 seconds.

What did Batman say to his parents? Nothing. They're dead. Idiot.

Why are so many children obese? Because they eat to much and they are not physically active enough

?"what's up" "A preposition"

In an alternate universe, Jake Sulley's brother did not die. The human race proceeded to strip-mine Pandora of all its mineral wealth, and slaughtered the entire indigenous population.

Why were the floors of the movie theaters so sticky? Spilled beverages.

1,984

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Actually 6 wasn't afraid of 7 because numbers have are not living things, therefore have no consciousness or emotions, meaning that numerical digits can not have a fear or be afraid of another number.

What do you call a black man selling drugs? average

A priest, a nun, and a rabbi walk into a bar. There's a massive earthquake and the bar collapses to the ground, killing everyone inside.

Why did the black man rob a KFC? He was in a very difficult financial situation and was worried his kids would go homeless. After scouting various locations he found the security at a nearby KFC was non-existent.

*Knock knock* Who's there? *Silence* (The person knocking is deaf)

What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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