why did the girl cross the road? to commit suicide

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Why did sam and jolanda drop their pudding? They got hit by a flying tree.

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Roses come in a variety of colors.

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What did the fat guy say to the skinny guy? You're skinny

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why did susie fall off the swing? she had no arms and no legs. knock knock who's there? not susie

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kknocckkck knockckkckccck hue's theeeair? TTThhe pOOOliCCee. fffor whaaa? yyouu rr arreesstedd forrr drrunkkkc dddrivvinnng! Puuut urerre frreaakkki'n hannnddss uppp!

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Why do people like the number 69? Because some people have favorite numbers, and 69 is a number.

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Why can't the boy ride his bike to school? It has no wheels.

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What happened when the Mexican man contracted the muscles of his large bowel after a large meal? Shit made its way to his anus

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Whats worse than swinging a dead baby by a rope? Stopping it with a shovel.

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why did the kid get in trouble. Because he put this up in typing class -charles hall aka chuckles

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What do you call somebody from Manchester? A twat

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Why did the little boy stick a fork in the electrical socket? Because he wanted to escape his abusive stepfather

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Why was the man sad His son got raped

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Why did the chicken cross the road? -Why? I don't know,I'm asking you the question.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being held for random.

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What do you call a man with no heart? Dead

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Did the Chicken cross the road? No the road moved the chicken across.

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Womens rights

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How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

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How do you make someone to go away from you? You rape them How do you get santa to not give you presents anymore? You rape him How do you get the easter bunny to stop coming to your house? Friend: you rape him? No, you ask him politly to leave.

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If there are 50 oranges and 50 waffles tied to a fence post. How many cow utters does it take to shit green? urine.

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Hey Jay, did you here the one about the 3 hookers at the bar? Jay didn't reply because he was deaf

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Two muffins are in the oven, One says "Damn it, so hot in here," The other one says " Wow! Muffin which can talk!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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