Goats are like mushrooms, if you shoot a duck, I'm scared of toasters. -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

thumb_up thumb_down -14

alert('hiiii');

thumb_up thumb_down -14

There once was a man from Kentucky...then he raped everyone in sight... THE END

thumb_up thumb_down -14

why did the lady fall on the ground? The cord for the parachute was cut by her husband

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's worse than getting AIDS? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you do when you have those days where you feel that you go back three damn steps for every step you take towards your goal? DUUUUUH! You turn your back, see? Now you are getting three steps at the right direction for every right one! LOGIC!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the dad do immediately do after his child died? Cleaned off the knife.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did Helen Keller say when she got raped? Stop raping me.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A choir boy is hit by a car outside church. Someone runs to him and says "shall I fetch the priest?" The boy starts to mumble something but quickly loses consciousness, and later dies after 16 hours in ICU.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the Mexican man say to the American man? Nothing. Neither of them spoke the same language.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Jimmy was skipping in the park one day when a young boy stopped him. "Hello there, would you like to be friends? We can go behind the old oak tree and play soccer!" asked the boy. "Ok!" replied Jimmy, and they went off together to play. The so-called 'young boy' was actually a wanted midget rapist. Jimmy was brutally raped and filmed. The film was later uploaded onto the internet where it blew up in a matter of weeks. Jimmy had to move schools 6 times and had to go to counselling every week. He finds it hard making friends and later went on to become a heavy cocaine addict.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What makes a good jack-o-lantern? A pumpkin

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call a qoman with 10 kids? A mother with 10 kids

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you stop a charging rhinocerous? Nuke africa.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

When I exited the hospital one day, I spotted a sign saying "Come back soon!" Soon afterwards I saw people protesting to ban dihydrogen monoxide. The next day on tv I saw an ad for a solar powered lightbulb. Then I saw a Gun control poster. I cried, this being the dumbest thing I had seen yet, and the world was certainly doomed due to humanity's general stupidity. I saw a chicken crossing a packed road. Why did the chicken feel the urge to cross the road?

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Cry me a river. then try and build a bridge, fail, and walk away frustrated

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What is Oedipus' favorite tv show! How I Met Your Mother

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What is funnier than an uncontrolled explosions? Most things, because explosions damage property, and cause deaths.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

UNICORNZ R PURPUL

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the chicken cross the road? Becuase as a chicken its intulect this very low so walking in the middle of the street was it's 1st instest. Ther'for it crossed the road and made it to the other side safe. Now please don't ask me a stupid question like that again.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What did the ketchup say to the mustard? Nothing they're just condiments.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Graphed: hey kids it's time to grape ya in the mouth Girl: noooooooooooooooooooooooooooo Random guy who sponsors the comercial: why is she screaming isn't thus about our new grape drink? Grapist: well… yes but look at the wY she's dresses she totally wants it.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

you know you are a prostatute when your report car is full of Ds

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops