Why didn't Joe's toaster work anymore? Because he dropped it into the bathtub with him.

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Why do vampires suck the blood of their victims? Because blood is very nutritious and provides more iron for heamoglobin.

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Why was the black man eating a banana? Because bananas are an excellent source of potassium.

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Q: Why did the little girl upset? A: Because she was part of the human centipede

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What do you do when your dishwasher isn't working? Beat it senseless, and then tell your wife you need a new one.

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Why did the Black man cross the street? To get to the other side.

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What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing because polar bears lived in the northern hemisphere and penguins lived in the southern. But if one is smuggled from north to south or vice-versa. The polar would growl and consume the penguin.

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Knock-Knock. Who's there? The person knocking at your door.

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Surprise mother father (A+)

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Mary had a little lamb. Then Died.

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What do you call a fly without wings? A fly without wings.

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What did 6 say to 7? Nothing, numbers are abstract concepts thought up by humans and therefore, they cannot speak or converse in any sort of language.

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Q.Want to hear somthing that will never happen A. Sure A. the Houston Astros won a game.

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What Happends When Sawdust Gets in your mouth You poop logs

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves when he realizes he is supposed to be at a business meeting

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What does 1+1 equal? 2

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LeBron James hits a game winning three with time running out in the Finals.

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A mexican and a black guy are in a car. Who's driving? The chauffer, they are both rich business men.

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hey

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Why did the Kek Kick Ben? Cause Ben kicked Kek's Kik. KEKEKEK

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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I enjoy the fact that the jokes I post that do not make me laugh, are the ones that get zero thumbs, while those that at least make me smile, get at least a couple, I admit thought that its hard to keep track with me, I type jokes so fast that they disappear in the back before people can thumb them... Have you heard... Of the dog that was barking up the wrong three? The three said: Damn dog! I am not a tree! The dog kept barking, as dogs do not speak. Moral: Numbers speak fluently in most languages though...

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what would you do if Michael Jackson was drowning? he can't drown he's already dead

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ALL OF YOU NO MORE CURSING EVEN THOUGH ITS NOT POSSABLE SO DON'T LISTEN

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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