What would be the consequence of a terrorist detonating a 500 kT nuclear bomb in Manhattan? A ridiculous question. All enriched uranium in Pakistan is safe and out of reach of terrorists, their govt. has assured. Please ask about realistic scenarios next time.

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Why are blondes stupid? They are not. Its just in America society has been given that impression through inaccurate and crude jokes.

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What happened to the chicken crossing the road? She found a male chicken, had many babies and lived happily forever after.

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Knock-Knock. Who's there? The person knocking at your door.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen.

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Augustus was touring his Empire and noticed a man in the crowd who bore a striking resemblance to himself. Intrigued, he asked: ‘Was your mother at one time in service at the Palace?’ ‘No, your Highness,’ he replied, ‘but my father was.

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Why did the room packed with married people seem empty? Maybe they were all playing hide-and-seek. Or maybe the room was pitch black and they were all standing very still and quietly.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. This next line doesn't rhyme. Nor does this one. This isn't a very good poem.

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Did you hear about the speed reader on top of the Twin towers? 90 stories 5 seconds.

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? He was hit by a bus!

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It was a stormy night and a stinking boy was running away from the co-op, he was clutching onto his pocket and constantly looked over his shoulder.... panting the boy reaches for a rusty door handle he opens the door quickly and shuts it behind him. "mam i got tea" said the boy "thanks david we will eat tonight for once" said a big chinned pharaoh.

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Those days where everything goes wrong, and you think to yourself "I just gotta do whats right here"... ...Sigh... 2. DO YOU KNOW WHY I HATE YOU SO MUCH? BECAUSE I HATE YOU! (Blame is on me, love and hate are not opposites, send me a copy of your book, and ill rip it out for you)

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? I don't eat hot dogs. Thank you though.

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What did the Neo-Nazi say to the Jew? Hello.

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You should periodically review the most up-to-date version of the Terms of Service. Oh you.

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Knock knock ... KNOCK KNOCK ... I guess nobody's home.

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Special Olympics? Not being disabled.

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How do you know that god was a male? You don't, that's why it's called faith.

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obamas trench

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Have you heard about the new German microwave? It's a great labour-saving appliance that cooks food much more quickly than a conventional oven

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How do you become thinner in a week? Stand in front of a Bulldozer.

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Wanna hear a joke? Womens' rights

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A priest, a nun, and a rabbi walk into a bar. There's a massive earthquake and the bar collapses to the ground, killing everyone inside.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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