What did the kid with no arms get for christmas? No one knows he hasn't been able to open his presents yet.

A man walks into a bar. After several hours of drinking and loud unintellegable outbursts to those around him, the man wonders off to a nearby bus stop and relieves himself. He is now a registered sex offender.

How do you confuse Helen Keller? You don't. She's dead.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

What's worse than genital warts? Herpes. You can get rid of warts

a person smokes weed... and gets high

What did the judge say to the midget when he sent him to jail ? Stop beating your wife

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm random but can still rhyme Hatsune Miku

Yo momma's so fat that all the children within a close proximity of your home think that your mother is a very large woman.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black

Roses are red, violets are blue, I told you she was my Mom, but that didn't stop you!

Knock Knock Who's there? DC Soames. I'm arresting you for the suspected abduction and rape of Holly Harman.

Why did chuck Norris take his friends to the buffet? Because buffets are great social conventions due to the allowance of sharing social favors while grabbing a succulent meal. Visit golden corral today.

Did you know brown and green rhyme? Just not with each other.

Why did the school bus crash? The driver was a loaf of bread.

a man is bussy at work, when he gets called by his doctor. YOUR WIFE IS HAVING A BABY! the doctor yells. so the man runs to his car, drives home like a madman, and arrives home with his doctor holding the newborn in his arms. "congratulations" the doctor says "it's a boy" the man takes the baby in his arms and says: "but, this child is black!" his wife cheated on him and the familly breaks appart

A man walks into a bar and says "Ow".

Why did the plane crash? Why? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Knock Knock? Who's there? How did you know it was me?

What can you sit on, drink from and sleep on? A chair, a cup and a bed.

Blue fish occasionally consume large amopunts of the insides of oak trees.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them.

Ever see a man say goodbye to a shoe? Yes, once.

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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