How do you get a Mother out of a tree? Ask them to come down, because it is really not socially acceptable for a responsible adult to be climbing trees.

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nena. nerna. neener. neezie. nena.

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Two hunters walk in to the forest. They have a great time ending the lives of defenceless creatures. They go to their respective homes, eat a light dinner, and fall asleep in their beds.

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Why didn't the disabled kid cross the road? He didn't make it.

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A fat lady walks into a bar. Your probably wondering what she ordered. She ordered a ham burger.

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What is 2 + 2? 3 LOL

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You've heard of take your child to work day, but I bet you haven't heard of 9/11- take your plane to work day

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman

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Knock knock Who's there? Honey, just let me in. This bloody game can't go on for an hour. I'm cold out here.

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What's the difference between a tomato and a rhinoceros? Neither of them can ride a bicycle.

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whats long and pointy and guys always have to brag about whos got the biggest one? their christmas trees

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what has 2 eyes but can't see... an asian

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Two boys were walking down a building which was under construction. Suddenly a brick hits the 1 one in the head while the 2 guys aunt was in America.

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Two Gay Men Walk Into a Bar, Not Just Any Bar...... a Sports Bar and Enjoy a nice cold Beer with their Heterosexual friends while watching the super bowl. They both go in the back room, where it is dark, together........ and they call for the manager to find out where the chef is so they can tie him down..... and smother him....... in questions concerning the size of his....... buffalo wings stop judging people you ass.

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yo' momma's so fat that when she saw a doctor he told her that she was overweight.

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What do you call a girl with 1 eye and 3 arms... Chernobyl.

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What do you call a comedian who can;t make people laugh? A bad comedian.

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Dad: "Happy birthday, son! Let's go get a beer." Timmy: "But dad, birthdays are merely symbolic of how another year has gone by and how little we've grown. No matter how desperate we are, we hope that someday a better self will emerge, with each flicker of the candles on the cake, we know it's not to be, that for the rest of our sad, wretched pathetic lives, this is who we are to the bitter end. Inevitably, irrevocably; happy birthday? No such thing.” Timmy's mom had just died of cancer a few days ago. A friend walks in the door, not knowing Timmy's mom died just a few short days before his birthday. He screams, "Happy birthday!" TImmy: "Damn. I'm not going through this again."

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Not an anti-joke, but an anti-pick-up-line: How much does a polar bear weight? Not as much as you!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your Apple? Ebola

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Why wasn't the clown funny? He didn't have a face

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What stands on the corner oof every major city at night? A cop

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The dyslexic man called the black man a ginger.

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the man the invented it doesnt want it, the man that wants it doesnt need it, and the man the needs it doesnt know it....what is it? a coffin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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