I had a great joke to tell you. I didn't want people stealing my ideas so I didn't write it. Haha

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How many unicorns does it take to change a light bulb? 17. 11 if its Tuesday.

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shammmm is a lesbian.

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A cup of ranch walks into a lemon

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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If Jimmy has 50 pieces of candy and eats 40 of them, what does he have now? Jimmy has diabetes.

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A man walks into a bar. It was a metal bar. He cracked his skull and died in the hospital shorty afterward.

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What do you call an Irish man with no legs? Handicapped

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when i start seeing A TON of black people what does that mean? im color blind

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What has two legs and is covered in red. Half a dog.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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What did the the boy get from his grandma for Christmas. Nothing. she died a week ago.

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Why was the boy wearing pyjamas? It was his bed time.

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you know whats funny... nothing.

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cancer

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Why did Susan fall out a tree? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Susan

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What did the Lightning Bolt say to the Thunder Cloud? WATTSup?

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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"Sorry, our servers are being derpy right now. Try to refresh the page, or check out some of our other sites." "Couldn't find the lulz you were looking for. Try to refresh the page, or check out some of our other sites." HORSEHEAD NETWORK... YOU CANT HANDLE THE LULZ! MORAL MAN!

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What does the scouter say about his power level? It's over 9'000!!!!!!!!

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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When life gives you melons, you're dyslexic.

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So there are two kids in bumper cars at the local fair. A nuke was set off underground and most of the metropolitan was annihilated.

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How do you make bread out of corpses? You don't. You grow it with bread seeds.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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