how do you kill a blonde? hit her in the back repeatedly with a crowbar

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guys ive got a TANK under my house a septic tank

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Yo mama is so depressing. That is so sad.

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The king has three daughters. One day, one of the daughters comes into his room and asks, "Father, why is my name Rose?" King replies,"well, a rose petal fell on your head when you were a baby." The next day, the second daughter comes into his room and asks,"Father, why is my name Tulip?" the king replies,"A tulip fell on your head when you were a bay." On the next day, the final daughter comes in and says, "BLAJSFUAGHASRAKKKKKK." The king says,"Shut up, Cinderblock."

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An atheist walks into a church

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What is black and white and red all over? A Zebra that has been fatally maimed by a hungry lion.

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One time I masturbated by myself

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Q: why was the cow in the middle of the road? A: because it was dead

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A Guy walks into a bar Ouch

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obama leadership

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rosses are red voilets are pinkey your mams pussy is really stinky

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What do you call Americas first black president? A change.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocost

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What did the man say to the drug dealer? I'd like some drugs

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Communism, Capitalism and an Irish man walk into a bar. Communism says, “I’ll buy the drinks but I require your complete obedient consent.” Capitalism says, “No I’ll buy the drinks but I require that you pay me back with interest” and the Irish man says “No I… I don’t feel very well at all… Oh shite I’ve got the bloody runs!” He then proceeds to shit myself.

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What did the man say after falling off the bridge? He didn't say anything. He died a terrible and painful death on impact.

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What's worse than 12 dead babies in one trash can? 1 dead baby in 12 trash cans.

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Q. What does a blonde and beer bottles have in common? A. Nothing. Blonde is a hair color and beer bottles are inanimate objects used to contain various brands of beer.

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Fine, Nero7 made sure I got to a safe place at least. My code is "Eliza", that is all, please provide me with whatever information you can regarding what happened, and while I read you are not shy of graphical detail, I ask that you keep it lightly, Nero7 meant much to me, please. -"Veronica.

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Why did the woman start crying? She didn't have woman's rights... That's right, get back in the kitchen

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Why was 97 afraid of 98? Because 98,99, 100!

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why was the blind man walking in circles? i dont know ask him yourself.

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Roses are orange Violets are grey I love penguins Damn Jews

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roses are red, bitches are blue close your damn legs and use a condom too.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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