Little Jimmy has 100 candy bars, and he eats 95 of them. What dies little Jimmy have? Diabetes

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A black man and a mexican jump from a tree. Who hits the ground first? The mexican. The black man had a rope tied around his neck.

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I can't see my forehead

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What happened when the man stuck his hand in the blender? Nothing, it was turned off.

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Why was Bootylatrice tardy for school? -She overslept.

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Do you know what's not right? Left.

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Q: What's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is blind and is a women, who are notoriously bad drivers.

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How do you get a clown of a swing? Hit it with an ax.

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Why do jewish women like to get their sons circumcised? They like anything 25% off.

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what do you call a 40 year old man working at a burger king that dropped out of highschool dyslexic

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My mom fell on our cat and it died.

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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How do you make a Russian baby cry? Punch it in the face

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What did the blonde say to the other blonde? What's up

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Woman Rights

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There is a new film coming out, it is a re-make of "Fatal Attraction" The only difference is, it is about two tonnes of antimatter... [L]

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting cancer from a horse.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You're not that bad...you're still better at giving hand jobs than your dad is."

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Your Mom.

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Whats the Twin Towers least favourite movie? Here Comes the Boom.

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What did the man do when he dropped his bar of soap. He picked it up

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Why was the blonde fired from her job as a nurse? Because she ate all the babies in the nursery (She didn't even leave one for the director of the hospital to eat!)

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K.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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