crap!!

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what did the horse say to the bartender? why the short face?

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Why do gay people go to the beach on memorial? idk im not gay

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An Englishman, and Irishman, and a Scottsman walk into a bar and the bartender says, "Is this some kind of a joke?"

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Wanna hear a joke? Joe Jonas.

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Your mum is so overweight, she is at risk of heart disease, I highly recommend she visits her GP.

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hey bill!

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Jesus once got nailed to a cross, beaten and gave his life in order to prove he was immortal. Safe to say, people remain impressed even 2000 years later. Moral: Lol, hey, its quite a feat, but what life did he give if he was immortal? Jesus is a okay dude though, he stole donkeys from stables (for transport) and when his disciples asked if stealing was bad he replied: God will provide for them. Awesome.

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roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweat and so are you

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A man walks up to a woman in a bar. They hit it off. That night they make wild sex and fall madly in love with each other. They start dating, it's so fantastic. They understand each other on almost every emotional and intellectual level. They have the same humor and they love spending time together. The sex is so great. After a few years, they get married, and they start the rest of their lives together. They have 2 beautiful children and their lives are blossoming. Fast forward 30 years. They are both retired old people, yet still madly in love. They live in their old home, and their lives are very comfortable. Their children have grown up into adults, and are very happy. Fast forward another 10 years, and they now live in an elderly home. They are both in wheelchairs and their health is slowly deteriorating. They die.

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Q: What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? A: They both have handlebars except for the duck!

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? Sitting on a black man is just plain rude.

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Why doesn't Rosa Parks eat bacon? Because she's dead.

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want to hear a bird joke? no well, this is hawkward

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out it's an orange

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What did the statue say to the other statue? Nothing, statues cant speak.

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What do you call girls that can run faster than me? Virgins

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Luke Hardie is G@Y

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Why didn't the blonde laugh at my blonde joke? She's dead. She should of laughed at my jokes more.

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when im sad im feel horny i rape little children -jimmy saville , last words of the diary

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What's the difference between a murcielago and a dead baby ? I don't have a dead baby in my garage. 8-)

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Q. have you seen stevie wonders last album? A. neither has he.

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So 2 black guys walk into a bar and the bartender looks around and say "what will you fine gentlemen have?" and they order and payed their tab and could not have been more courteous, amirite?

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay is irrelevant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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