Q: What's worse than the holocaust. A: Me not getting my Christmas presents.

a man walks into a bar he got hurt

There was a baby, and it wouldnt stop crying. So the mom shook it and shook it. Then it stopped crying.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

Suzie hates cancer, Her granny got killed by a driver that suffered from it

So. The gays. ...

Q.What do you call a apple with a unibrow? A. A failed science experiment!!!

What did the man say to his wife right before they got married? "I do."

What did the young boy get His dad for fathers day? Nothing, his dad died from a very aggresive cancer

Why is Skrillex bad at fishing? Lack of experience.

DONT READ THIS. YOU WILL BE KISSED ON THE NEAREST POSSIBLE FRIDAY BYrnTHE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE.TOMMOROW WILL BE THE BEST DAY OF YOUR LIFE. NOWrnYOU'VE STARTED READING THIS. DON'T STOP. THIS IS SO FREAKY.rn1. say your name ten times.rn2.say your mom's name five times.rn3. say your crushes three timesrn4. paste this to four other groups.rnIf you do this, your crush will kiss you on the nearest Friday.rnBut if you read this and do not paste this, then yournwill have very bad luck.rnSEND THIS TO 5 GROUPS IN 143 MINUTES. WHENrnYOU'RE DONE PRESS F6 AND YOUR CRUSH'S NAME WILL APPEAR IN BIG LETTERSrnON THE SCREEN. THIS IS SO FREAKY BECAUSE IT ACTUALLY WORKSrnrnrn

i was raised in a bad family. i was the youngest and i was abused then i died three years back. then i died again and then i died again then i died again then again then i LIVED but then i died again then i died again then i died again then i died again

A black man, a Jew, and a homosexual are at a bar together. They drink for a few hours, during which time they catch up with each other and share stories, as it has been some time since the three of them have seen each other. After they are done drinking, they call a friend, who comes to pick them up and take them home. What a fine example of drinking responsibly.

roses are red violets are blue i have alziemers what are we talking about again

Not everyone with a mustache is a child molester, but not every child molester has a mustache.

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar and decide to have a drinking contest. Who won? The rabbi. The priest died of alcohol poisoning later that night.

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Why did the dog have 2 legs? he got cut in half.

Knock knock! Who's there? Alzheimer's. Alzheimer's who? Knock knock!

Why did the kid fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms. Why couldn't he get up? Because he had no legs. Knock, Knock Who's there? Not that kid.

What is 4 letters and made out of wood? Wood.

A man walks into a bar and says "Ow".

what do you call a group of people who are systematiclly ruining a once well run family football club? steve kean , the venkys, and there advisors

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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