why did the black guy win a gold medal in the olympics? hard work, dedication and determanation! what no one else can be bothered to do anymore because of all this new technology and stuff!! get of your arse and do something active. NOW!

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Suzie has no arms and no legs and is on a swing. what happened? she fell and died knock knock whos there? not suzie.

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Why did the President Truman approve the use a nuke over Hiroshima? Sending Chuck Norris was widely considered to be too cruel.

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One white male lives in a city with all blacks. He puts up with gang violence nearly every day.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They are both eaten fifteen minutes later.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

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Barack Obama.

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national song of the mute person? 5 minutes of silence please

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What would be the consequence of a terrorist detonating a 500 kT nuclear bomb in Manhattan? A ridiculous question. All enriched uranium in Pakistan is safe and out of reach of terrorists, their govt. has assured. Please ask about realistic scenarios next time.

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Why did the blond play Russian roulette? She is very poor and needs the money so she can feed her son.

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Why are blondes stupid? They are not. Its just in America society has been given that impression through inaccurate and crude jokes.

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Why did nick and tyler visit anti-joke.com? Because they have nothing better to do.

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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A tiger walks into a bar. Clearly there is something wrong with animal control.

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whats white and cant climb a fence? a fridge

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Knock-knock. Who's there? The Chicken.

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What did the two fire men say to each other whilst a house was burning? Well be better put that fire.

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What do you get when you cross some eggs and some toast? Breakfast.

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What did the black man say to the man from Kyrgyzstan? I've never heard of your country before.

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What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? The hooker is a human being whereas the onion is a vegetable.

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Knock knock Who's There? Idk, who the **** names their kid There?

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue Bitches Like U Belong In The Zoo

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what did the duck say to the hawk? quack

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What did the widow get for mothers day A miscarriage

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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