What do you call a kid with cancer? screwed

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Men's Sports

thumb_up thumb_down +3

My mom gave me a quarter. I tryed to spend it on bubblegum but 7-11 said no...

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Knock Knock Not Yet

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did was micheal jackson named micheal jackson? because his was

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did Hellen Keller call her dog? Kamikaze-go, because he was an Akita from Japan and that was his name.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the teacher yell at her students? The class was acting completely inappropriate and she felt it was necessary to discipline them so the current situation won’t repeat its self.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Hey I just met? you and this is crazy I have alzheimers Hey I just met you

thumb_up thumb_down +3

We are lawyers

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did one computer say to the other? 100111010100100111001010010001110101110010100010101011010011010010111000010101100100100100001101010000011111010010011010100110101001010100101010101010100101011010010010101010110010110010100100010101010101010

thumb_up thumb_down +3

There are 100 men enjoying a cruise to celebrate an important contract going through at their place of employment. The boat then suffers a major malfunction and tragically sinks to the bottom of the ocean, miles from any land masses. Not a single man died, how is this possible? They all used the lifeboats supplied on the boat and followed the standard procedure to deal with such a crisis.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a man who is dirty, and is searching through a pile of garbage? A man who threw out his divorce papers.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did one hostage say to the other hostage? Hrmfhrmfphmfr

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Last night I had a Chinese By that I mean I abducted some Chinese people and ate them

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's a fail with a bowl on its head, a 30 year old, and a 5 year old at the same time? Justin Beiber

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did samantha die? Because she had cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a black priest? A black priest

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the World Chicken Road Crossing Competition.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How did the snail travel around the world without any help from a transportation device? Sadly, it didn't. The snail is incapable of this kind of long distance travel due to it's small size, lack of speed and short lifespan.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q-What do you call kids who go to school? A- Students.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the boy do when he struck out in his little league game? He was very upset and contemplated not playing the game anymore.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why are Asians so good at mathematics? Practice.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

You're smart... And I can tell a joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops