Explain the term 'Standard of Living'? Not having sex with diseased and obese women.

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Why did the Mexican man jump to the floor? He had a stroke.

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What's harder nailing 10 babies to 1 tree... Or nailing 1 baby to 10 trees???

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Deadly cancer.

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why didnt the chicken cross the road? It was getting tired of the jokes

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What did one baby say to the other? Nothing, they're both dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because he was hungry and mcdonalds was across the street

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Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. Bob has been missing since Friday.

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Patients: Whats happening doctor Doctor: I am afraid you all have tested positive Patients: Oh No!!! Doctor: Positive for being great friends all these years! Patients: Oh Doctor you are so.... Doctor: ASWELL AS AIDS!!!

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do not read this(this is intended to be read)

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what did the jewish kid get for his birthday......Striped pajamas

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what did the horse say after the man told him to have a good day? nothing, horses dont talk.(:

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I farted!!!!! t'was smelly??????? I LIKE CRABS! #tomato problems

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hipsters

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Why did the blind kid hit the other kid in the face? He was trying to give him a high-five.

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Know what would be awkward, if a GPS told a gay guy to get straight.

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Patient: Doctor, I've been having a problem, I can't remember anything. Doctor: Do you think you might have amnesia, a common memory problem. Patient: What Problem?

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What do you call a dog with no arms and no legs. It doesn't matter what you call him he still won't come.

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My friend asks me what my mom does for a living and i told him that she is a nurse. Then he says "That a good job because she is able to save lives". I quickly reply "She works in an abortion clinic".

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What do you get when you cross a zebra and a panda? Well, pandas are almost extinct. I guess they gave up and started goin' with zebras.

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why is red the first color in the rainbow? I don't know go ask a scientist.

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Why did the kid tell yo mama jokes to insult other kids? His mom had just committed suicide due to depression caused by the kid's bad habits.

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Jamie stegman is a masive idiot and does not have a life at all he is a tool which is true becuase no one likes him

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because the walk sign said to

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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