What did the girl say when she arrived at the party? "I like what you did with the furniture!"

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whats the only concert you can get into for 45 cents? a 50 cent concert featuring Nickelback

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How do you make a plumber sad? Kill his family.

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What did the mother get her blonde daughter for her birthday? A flower on her tombstone.

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say this really fast dick chick, chick, dick, dick chick,chick dick, dick chick if you cant like it

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What do a fish, a can of asparagus, a spool of thread, and a car tire have in common? Nothing.

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if life gives you lemonnde your probally halusinating

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Whats a black persons favorite flavored cake? fried chicken.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? playing spin the bottle with your mom

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Give a man a fish, feed him for a week. Teach a man to fish, he'll starve to death. Provide this man a fishing rod, and now finally you're doing something helpful.

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A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," comes the reply. The first man then asks: "Where are you from?" "I'm from Ireland," replies the second man. The first man responds: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland." "Of course," replies the second man. I'm curious, the first man then asks: "Where in Ireland are you from?" "Dublin," comes the reply. "I can't believe it," says the first man. "I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin." "Of course," replies the second man. Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: "What school did you go to?" "Saint Mary's," replies the second man, "I graduated in '62." "This is unbelievable!", the first man says. "I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!" About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's been going on?" he asks the bartender. "Nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Kinly twins are drunk again."

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None.

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What do you do with dead chemists? You carefully place their remnants in a casket, which is to be placed in a precisely dug hole. Once the casket is placed, you put a gravestone into the ground, signifying the chemists' date of birth and death.

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Three men are walking down the street to buy groceries. They then take a left and continue walking towards the store.

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What is yellow and has thick, shiny fur? A banana. I lied about the fur.

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Mac: Hi, I'm a Mac! PC: And I'm a PC. Steve Jobs died.

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What did the dog say to the cat? "Bark."

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Your momma went to the gym, because she is fat.

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What is the answer to number 7 on the test? Time for you to get a watch.

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Why can't we see the wind? Because no one likes you...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I threatened to throw a fridge at it

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A Girl Who was very close to er grandmother got a text from her mom who was very new to texting, she thought lol meant "Lots Of Love" wel it turns out the Girl's Grandmother Passed away Sunday Morning And the Mom sent the text to the girl saying " Your Grandmother Got hit by a truck and died lol" the Girl Killed Herself that night becasue Of her mom, LESSON LEARNED< LEARN HOW TO TEXT.

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Kathy Griffin.

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What kind of sex do you have with twenty seven year olds any kind you want there are twenty of them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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