How do you make someone to go away from you? You rape them How do you get santa to not give you presents anymore? You rape him How do you get the easter bunny to stop coming to your house? Friend: you rape him? No, you ask him politly to leave.

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Q: Why did the prostitute have no arms? A: Because she was an amputee.

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What's the difference between Amy Winehouse and Michael Jackson? Spelling.

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After finishing reading this sentence, read it again and you might or might not realise that there is a secret subliminal message in this sentence making you do something later tonight. Can you spot it?

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what is worse than a pile of dead babies? there is one alive at the bottom. what is worse than that? it eats its way out.

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What do you call a black man with a job? An employee

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Luck is not real. But the dismembered body in my basement is.

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your mammas so poor she is probably going die in a few days of starvation

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what is big, white, and can't climb a tree? a fridge

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What's the difference between a plumber and a husband? Both fuck the same women when the other is away.

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Two gay men walk down the street holding hands, and are applauded for expressing their love for each other.

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Ron Paul for President!

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how many blonds does it take to screw in a lightbulb? one, because she is an intelligent and capable woman

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What's the difference between a plum and bunny? They're both purple, except the bunny.

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Joe Alfon walkes into hell, The devil say: " hi" And joe burns to death

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and mop. In turns out the bartender was a paranoid schizophrenic and was hallucinating.

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how did the monkey fall out of the tree he was stupid how did the monkey get a black eye he was hit by a bus how did the monkey end up in the sewer he got hit by another bus

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What's retarded and comes from Hulsberg? Roy Knubben

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I'd feel bad for some skinny guy who lived in a very obese family and only got hand me downs.

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how do you make a orange juice. get orange juice and pour it in a cup.

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YA MAM, is a very nice person

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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obama

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You`re honor, he fell off the staircase, I demand that staircase ends up in jail! Case closed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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