A woman walks into the living room while her husband is watching tv. The husband tells her "Make me a Sandwich", so she goes to the kitchen and makes him a sandwich like shes told to.

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Whats worst than getting raped by an old man? -Nothing, getting raped is probably the worst thing to happen to you.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Your mom is so fat, she is having angioplasty. She might need a ride a home.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who`s there? Not Suzie

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what do a jew homosexual and a latino all have in common? human dignity.

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What did the fish say when it hit a wall? Nothing. Fish cannot talk.

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Whats an Anti Joke

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A man walks into a bar, drinks a few beers, then calls a taxi to take him home because he knew the risks of drunk driving.

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What did the man say to his wife right before they got married? "I do."

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Have you heard about the Polish kamikaze pilot? No, you haven't, because it would be historically and culturally incorrect.

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? Ask the starving African.

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Why don't men ask for directions? They want to appear knowledgeable and strong. Asking for directions is sometimes considered a sign of weakness.

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What's funnier than 24? 25

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex afender

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68

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzie

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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you just contradicted yourself.

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Coffee just isn't his cup of tea.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because she had no arms or legs. Knock knock. Whose there? Not Sally.

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What did the victim say to the rapist? If you're gonna rape me, at least let me go get you a condom

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i shouldnt be on this cause im in class

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Why can't Anne Frank drive? Because she's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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