Lol! Why you wanna know?

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A conversation between friends ( or some what.) Joe: I'm thinking about going out of state for college ... Rick: your mom went to college! Joe: yes she did Rick that's why shes a docker and my families rich.

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What's worse than a crying baby? A dead one...

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Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

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Why was the kid happy? Because it was his birthday.

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when im sad im feel horny i rape little children -jimmy saville , last words of the diary

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Hey, I just met you... No, I'm your brother. You've known me for 30 years. You must have memory loss.

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Why i'm breathing? I don't want die.

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What is grey and looks like a rock? A rock

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A man dressed in a business suit goes into a doctor's office. He asks the receptionist how much a vasectomy would cost. After a minute of her looking it up on the computer she turns to him and says "The procedure will cost $750." He then thanks her and leaves.

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A man walked into a Persian dentist office. After a few hours he leaves the office with his mouth feeling much better because the oral-surgery went exeptionally well.

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- Mom, you've got a banana in your ear. - Son I can't hear you I've got a banana in my ear!

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Roses are red, violets are blue. Cassidy's a whore so open the door.

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Yo momma so Fat that she got picked for the Olympic Swim Team

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't get back up? She had no legs.

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Why did the man get fired? Because he had cancer

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Doctor! Doctor! There's a fly in my soup! Gross.

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Why could'nt the boy eat peanuts? Because if he did he would proceed to have an allergic reaction, his throat would swell up, he would go into analeptic shock and die.

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I once heard what I consider the best joke ever: But I am not telling it to you, because this is a the anti-joke section. Moral: You better find the secret "real jokes section" because its there, yeeeeeess yeeeeeeeeees of coursehahahahaha!

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a little boy goes down stairs on xmas day he has three presents the first one was a pair of socks the second one was a football and the third one was shin pads the boy was now crying really loud santa is outside laughing why? the boy has no legs

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What's the difference in an orange? A chicken because a vest has no sleeves.

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Knock, Knock... Who's there? Your mother and I are getting a divorce.

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"life is like a box of chocolates", except you cant eat life and hocolate doesnt rain on you.

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Women's rights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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