No, we got to speak now, or you know, never.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's one thing good about cancer? (make them guess) Nothing you fricking prick!

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the chicken cross the road? Someone threw birdseed.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why do jewish women like to get their sons circumcised? They like anything 25% off.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

I was walking through the woods the other day when I heard a rustle in the bushes... So I went over and said, "Russell, What are you doing in the bushes?"

thumb_up thumb_down +25

"How come dinosaurs don't talk?" " I don't know. Why?" " Because they're dead."

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Bumper Sticker: I Brake for Stop Signs

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Q: What's worse than being forced to eat your veggies? A: Being forced to kill your parents with a carrot.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Let's see how many dislikes this can get!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why was 6 afraid of seven? Seven brutally abused and raped 6 as a child.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What is Lil Wayne's first name? Wayne

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the cat cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Q: I have 2 dogs. Why? A: I like dogs

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

thumb_up thumb_down +23

knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock kock ding dong ding di-ding dong zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz sigh weeeeeeeeeewooooooooooooooooo zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz hey yo wake up zzz-oh-huh-what-whos there i've been yelling for like five minutes oh sorry jim will you let me in already all right

thumb_up thumb_down +23

whats at the end of the rainbow? Purple

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What is large, white, and can't climb trees? A refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

How do you get three Canadians out of a pool? Say "Hey guys time to get out of the pool."

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Whats a black persons favorite flavored cake? fried chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A hipster gets summoned for jury duty. The case is solved promptly and everyone goes home happy.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why didn't Steve finish his homework? He didn't want to.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Yeah, I never intended to keep that a secret. What is autocast?

thumb_up thumb_down +23

whats long and green? weed

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops