Q:What's worse than stepping on lego? A:Hiroshima.

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why did the chicken cross the road to get to your house knock knock whos there the chicken

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What did the bully call the box? a square, needless to say the box was offended

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Why could the woman not play the game monopoly? Because she did not own the game monopoly

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Q: whats worse than a Muslim? A: a Jew

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What's black and blue and red all over? The dead woman in the dumpster.

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Why was the accountant sad? He just watched his wife have consensual sex with another man.

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Why couldn't Timmy ride his tricycle? He was run over by a bus.

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Knock Knock! .... Knock Knock! ... There seems to be nobody at home...

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What did the cat say to the elephant? Meow.

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What do you call a black man that sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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Why is Pawn Stars the best show on the History Channel? Because Pawn Stars is the only show on the History Channel.

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Yo mamma's so fat, she's self-concsious about her weight and is embarassed when people make fun of her weight which makes her escape to her only friend, food, which makes her even fatter, so she will never lose weight until society accepts her and is not so prejudice towards overweight people.

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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What did the coach do to the player Coached the player

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A duck walks into a bar, and the bartender says "what'll it be?" The bartender is then sent to a medical clinic after letting several wild animals into his bar and proceeding to feed them alcoholic drinks. He is diagnosed with schizophrenia.

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A fish finds that his fishbowl is on fire. He escapes the bowl only to realize he is equally screwed.

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What did one prisoner on death row say to the other? Can you please clean off the seat when you're done? I'd like to die in my own urine.

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Roses are red Violets are blue If you came 'cause GameGrumps Fuck you.

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What do you call a Mexican on a boat? A sailor

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Violets are red. Roses are blue. I am drunk, and i'm about to spew.

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what do you call a mixbreed of a bull dog and a shitzu? a sharpei

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You are so stupid you should go to school and get an education so you are able to get a well paying job in this tough economy

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If life gives you melons you're dyslexic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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